Nanette D. Murphy: Beyond the Doom and Gloom of Divorce

There is no denying the fact that taking the leap of faith into a divorce is tough. Separating later in life, sometimes called “gray divorce,” can be an incredibly disorienting experience as well. After more than two decades or more, it is easy to be so involved with your spouse that you do not know if either of you can do it all alone at this stage in life. When you reach a certain age, you start to understand how short life is and want to make the most out of it. Going through so much and getting to know yourself so well should reflect on enjoying your life rather than being stuck in a lifeless, unhappy marriage. In such a case, working with a divorce coach can blur the line between just surviving and coming out of your separation with a new vision for the future. Nanette D. Murphy, a certified health coach, author, and founder of the online community Divorce After Forty has been focusing on coaching women over 40 to heal from the pain of divorce, grow through self-care, and redefine their purpose in life.

Early Life

Nanette was married for nearly 25 years when her marriage fell apart in 2010. She was devastated and went through a lot of emotional struggles, including depression and anxiety. It took some time to get through the trauma and move towards healing. She kept herself busy volunteering and caring for her three children when COVID-19 hit in 2020. Nanette decided to make the best of the lockdown and took up a free online course at Yale University (The Science of Well Being), where she learned about life coaching and went on to become a Certified Life Coach with The John Maxwell Team.  Nanette found a new purpose in life: empower women so that they not only survive the pain of a divorce but get through it stronger, wiser, and more courageous than ever.

Living with a Purpose

Nanette went through a very challenging time in her life and found strength after heartbreak. She discovered her purpose through self-care and growth. With the sole aim of guiding, supporting, and encouraging other women to do the same, she founded Live Life Now, LLC, in 2021, when she discovered that being a divorce coach was a thing. Having gone through a painful divorce herself, Nanette understood that a divorce coach could have held her hand at a very crucial time of her life, and she expects to do just that for others. She helps in areas such as managing finances, setting boundaries, grieving, going solo once again, health and wellness, dating, and re-marriage. There is a multitude of factors to be considered before even filing a divorce, and Nanette’s motto is to provide women with these essential pieces of information to get back on track. She does not strive to alleviate the pain of women who go through a divorce but rather wants to help them prepare for it, support them, and ensure they are not alone.

Divorce After Forty is a paid online community that Nanette started to empower those who are divorced, thinking of filing for divorce, recently filed for divorce or going through the process of divorce. She asks thought-provoking questions to help you find a new vision and fall in love with yourself again or for the first time. Through her approach, Nanette stresses self-care by learning to eat healthily and developing an exercise regime that suits your lifestyle. Members of the community share stories and advice to support other women as they embark on a fresh start. They also get access to articles and empowering information on a myriad of topics ranging from self-care, and finances to finding their purpose and learning to heal actively. Nanette’s community is a safe place for women who seek information, want to connect with other women at the same stage in their life, or just get together to let out their frustrations.

New Beginnings

It was Nanette’s life coach who encouraged her to write a book about her life, and thus, “Shattered Dreams and New Beginnings” was born. The book acted as a cornerstone for her foray into coaching as it chronicles her journey through heartbreak, healing, and growth and aims to inspire and give hope to others. She also wishes to write another book which will be a collaboration of stories of women who successfully built a happy and prosperous life after divorce.   

Further, Nanette is also in the process of securing a certification in Subconscious Release Technique (SRT) which helps clear mental and emotional blocks. She also plans to offer three Reiki sessions for those who plan to enroll in her summer coaching program. Meditation is another technique that she wants to add to her bouquet of services, and she plans to get certified in it as well to help other women understand and adapt to it. Nanette is currently trying to build a network of divorce attorneys and financial advisors who would offer help to her clients and community members.  

As a word of advice for women out there who are planning on getting a divorce, Nanette suggests they stop being so hard on themselves and reach out for help to go boldly into the next stage of their lives. “I am not an advocate of divorce, but it is, unfortunately, a part of the world we live in. Seek counseling and divorce coaching if you are considering a divorce. While counselors can help you navigate the mental challenges of the process, a coach will guide you through all the steps, which can get very overwhelming at times. I know I would have welcomed a coach if I had the opportunity back then. So, never hesitate to seek help,” Nanette added while speaking with WomLEAD Magazine.